Ruby sat in her car and kept
doing the same thing she’d been doing for the last forty-five minutes – looking up at
Gavin’s third floor suite from the Cleavertown Hotel parking lot. Though she
wanted to go to him so badly, she couldn’t seem to make herself leave the car.
“I’m
a coward,”
Ruby confessed aloud. She talked a good game in front of others, but inwardly
she was that same repressed girl that was afraid to let her real self show for
fear of being rejected. For fear of causing her family further shame.
The only time Ruby had ever
really let herself go for any extended period of time was when she went away to
college. There she found herself among other free spirits, people that weren’t
afraid to let their true selves show.
Willing to lower her own
inhibitions in such a liberated environment, Ruby unwisely used alcohol to
boost her courage. Over time too much drinking and partying led to some pretty
outrageous deeds. Most of which weren’t pretty at all.
The ugliest thing she’d ever
done was star in that video. Not only had it led to her father’s heart attack,
but it showed her just how vindictive some people could be. One vindictive
person in particular was Logan Benjamin – the only guy she dated in high
school.
Ruby turned down Logan’s
proposal of marriage not once, but twice. The first time occurred right after
high school graduation. The second came a year after she returned home from
college.
Ruby never thought Logan would
be the one to rat her out to her father. Not after years of declaring his
undying love for her. Plus why hadn’t he been more protective of Papa Hudson’s
heart? Did he care nothing for the man that mentored him over the years after
his own father deserted him as a child?
And yet Logan had been the
snitch of the century. He was the one that mentioned to Papa Hudson that he’d
seen Ruby in an X-rated video and then presented the incriminating DVD to back
up his story. And that was just one reason she barely even spoke to him in
greeting these days.
After her father’s heart
attack, Ruby tried to behave like a model citizen around her family and around
town. Finishing her college education online and taking on the sole
responsibility of keeping the family business going while her father recovered
helped her regain some level of respect from the people in the community. It
also helped Ruby and her family to reestablish civil dialogue.
Unfortunately, civil dialogue was
all she ever really had with her family, even though she longed for so much
more over the years. Her older sisters couldn’t identify with her on account of
how different she’d always been from them. On account of how different she
still was.
(c) 2014 by Mi'Chelle Dodson/Suprina Frazier
(c) 2014 by Mi'Chelle Dodson/Suprina Frazier
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